S07E21 - The Anything Can Happen Recurrence

No: 156  |  Season: 7   Episode: 21  |  Air Date: 2014-04-24  |  Runtime: mins

Psychic: There's a woman in your life you're having problems with. Sheldon: That's an easy guess. I'm clearly an annoying person and have problems with both genders.

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Summary

When Sheldon tries to be spontaneous, it leads to unexpected friction between the girls. Meanwhile, Raj seeks Howard's help in preparing for a date with Emily.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Steven Molaro & Eric Kaplan & Adam Faberman / Teleplay by: Jim Reynolds & Steve Holland & Tara Hernandez

Script

Script: S07E21 - The Anything Can Happen Recurrence

Quotes

Leonard: She got Sheldon to go to a psychic with her.
Amy: Psychic? He considers them not just mumbo jumbo, but extra jumbo mumbo jumbo.

Penny: Hey, maybe the answer to your career question is in one of these
(fortune cookies)
Penny: .
Sheldon: Penny, there's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems and that's an Oreo. Or a Nutter Butter if you're in a pinch.

Sheldon: Alright, alright, I'll shake the brain bush one more time, see what falls out.

Sheldon: Uh...
Penny: What's wrong?
Sheldon: I don't understand my food. It's Chinese noodles, Korean barbecue, and a taco.
Penny: It's fusion.
Sheldon: My mother would lock her car doors if she had to drive through this hodgepodge of ethnicity.

Penny: So, we're about to shoot this scene in a movie where the killer ape DNA is slowly taking over my body.
Leonard: Okay.
Penny: But I realize they're gluing fur everywhere except my cleavage. So, I ask the director why and he says it's important for the story that my boobs be the last things to turn ape.
Leonard: It's sweet that he thinks there's a story.
Penny: Oh, and there's not even a bathroom on set. I have to go to the gas station across the street. I mean, I was dressed like half an ape and still not even close to the most disgusting person in there.

Sheldon: Have you ever paid for a meal?
Penny: Not with money.

Sheldon: Amy's sick.
Leonard: Aw, what's wrong with her?
Sheldon: Well, she talks a lot. She always wants to hold hands.
Leonard: That's not what I meant.
Sheldon: If you were refering to her illness, you should have asked "What ails her?"
Leonard: What ails her?
Sheldon: Oh, who knows.

Penny: (Sees Amy and Bernadette at a cafe) Son of a bitch! Bernadette isn't working late!
Sheldon: And Amy doesn't look sick.
Penny: Why would they lie to us?
Sheldon: I don't know.
(Knock-knock-knock)
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette.
(knock-knock-knock)
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette.
(knock-knock-knock)
Sheldon: Amy and Bernadette. Why would you lie to us?

Raj: I was thinking we could watch a DVD.
Howard: Well, my mother doesn't have a lot of choices. Unless you want to watch a video of her colonoscopy. Spoiler alert: twenty minutes in, they find a prune pit.

Raj: Here we go. 'House of 1000 Corpses'.
Emily: Now, just so you know, I was a nanny for three years, so if you get scared I can totally change your diaper.
Raj: Actually, I have to tell you something. These kind of movies really aren't my thing, so... last night I watched it, just to see what I was getting myself into.
Emily: Okay...
Raj: And I have to be honest; I thought it was disturbing and weird. And it made me wonder what it says about someone who enjoys it.
Emily: I wonder that too.
Raj: Then, why do you watch these things?
Emily: Can I tell you something without you judging me?
Raj: Sure.
Emily: They kinda turn me on.
Raj: And play.

Sheldon: I don't mean to be rude or discourteous, but before we begin, I'd just like to say there is absolutely no scientific evidence to support clairvoyance of any kind. Which means again, no insult intended, that you're a fraud, your profession is a swindle and your livelihood is depended upon the gullibility of stupid people. But again, no offense.
Penny: Sheldon, ask your question.
Sheldon: OK, I just did. What was it?
Penny: Oh, for God sakes. Look he's a physicist who trying to figure out what his next field of study should be.
Sheldon: For your information I was asking her about the next Star Trek movie.
Penny: I can answer that one. I'll be bored.
Ms. Davora: All right. Why don't we begin? Your spirit guide is telling me that there's a woman in your life that you're having problems with.
Sheldon: That's an easy guess. I'm a clearly annoying person and have problems with both genders.
Ms. Davora: I know. You clearly are. But I'm seeing a specific woman that you're in a romantic relationship with.
Penny: Oh, oh. Here we go.
Sheldon: The majority of people have dark hair. Even you at one time.
Ms. Davora: Does she work in a similar field to you?
Sheldon, Penny: Ha. The opposite. She's a neurobiologist, I'm a theoretical physicist. My spirit guide can go suck an egg.
Ms. Davora: They're telling me that you have difficulty being close with her.
Penny: Oh, he does. He so does. What should he do?
Ms. Davora: He should give himself to this relationship. Once he does all his other pursuits will come into focus.
Penny: Sheldon, did you hear that? Amy is the key to your happiness.
Ms. Davora: Exactly. Personally and professionally everything will fall into place once you commit to her.
Sheldon: You know what this is? Yeah, and I reserve this word for those rare instances when it is truly deserved. This is malarkey.
Penny: Wow. You really struck a nerve. I've never heard him use the M word before.

Amy: I'm sorry. I just needed a break from hearing you obsess about what to do after string theory.
Bernadette: I kinda wanted one night where we didn't have to hear about how miserable you were making this movie.
Amy: None of that means we don't love you.
Penny, Leonard: I don't complain that much about the movie, have I?
Leonard: I also love you.

Sheldon: Hello. I didn't expect you this evening.
Amy: Well, I was just feeling so bad about lying to you the other night, I... wanted to make it up to you.
Sheldon: And how do you propose to do that?
(Amy drops her coat to the floor, showing she is wearing a Catholic schoolgirl outfit)
Sheldon: Now, unless you have Gravity on Blu-ray under that skirt, I don't know where you're going with this.

Sheldon: So, we're just randomly choosing a restaurant without researching it online?
Penny: Yup.
Sheldon: Great. See, this is how Anything-Can-Happen Thursday turns into It-Won't-Stop-Coming-Up Friday.
Leonard: Hey, how about that Asian fusion place?
Sheldon: Fusion *and* Asians? I'm trying not to think about science.

Raj: (pauses movie) Okay, so in the last twenty minutes we've seen a crazy woman kiss a fetus in a jar, a man cut in half and sewn to a fish...
Howard: The dismemberment of a rotisserie chicken by my mother. On the plus side, I don't think she saw the film.

Bernadette: I gotta go. Penny ratted me out.
(to Howard)
Bernadette: FYI she's getting you a watch for your birthday with money she took out of your wallet.

Penny: (Reads her fortune cookie) "People turn to you for guidance and wisdom." That's a good one.
Sheldon: No, it's not. Turn to you for guidance and wisdom? That cookie is clearly mocking you. You'd never get that kind of sass from a Nutter Butter.
Penny: Since you're paying for dinner, I'll let that slide.
(Gives Sheldon a cookie)
Penny: Read.
Sheldon: Have you ever paid for a meal?
Penny: Not with money. Read.
Sheldon: (Reads) "Your warm and fun-loving nature delights those around you."
Penny: Nope, try again.

Raj: Why does Emily like this stuff? Do you think there's something psychologically wrong with her?
Howard: What difference does it make?
Raj: What do you mean?
Howard: Oh come on, she could have a freezer full of ex-boyfriend's body parts and you'd still go out with her.
Raj: I do like that the ex-boyfriend's out of the picture.

Amy: I feel so bad about lying to Sheldon. How am I going to make it up to him?
Bernadette: I'll tell you what I'd do with Howard, but I don't think dressing up like a Catholic school girl is going to work with Sheldon.
(Amy stares off into the distance)
Leonard: He'd probably give you homework.

Penny: Sheldon, what did we say about being a nicer friend?
Leonard: Thank you.
Penny: Leonard, what did we say about being a gullible weenie?

Sheldon: If I want to waste my time on nonsense, I follow Leonard on Instagram.

Raj: You're a good friend. I owe you one.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Howard! Help me get out of the tub!
(Howard looks at Raj)
Raj: Not that one.

Sheldon: (to the psychic) You know what this is? Yeah, and I reserve this word for those rare instances when it's *truly* deserved. This is malarkey.
(he storms out)
Penny: Wow, you really struck a nerve. I've never heard him use the 'M' word before.

Raj: Why can't I be in a relationship with a girl who likes Sound of Music?
Howard: Raj, you are the girl in the relationship who likes Sound of Music.

Sheldon: There's only one cookie with something in the middle that solves life's problems, and that's an Oreo.

Amy: Once in a while, I get a little jealous of how close Penny and Sheldon are... I mean, not in a romantic way. It's just, she really has some sort of connection with him.
Leonard: Well... Well, they've known each other a long time, and Penny grew up around horses, so she knows how to approach him without making him skittish.

Sheldon: What can we do that's fun?
Leonard: What can we do that's different?
Penny: What can we do that's free?

Notes and Trivia

In this episode, the psychic tells Sheldon once he commits to his relationship with Amy, everything will fall into place regarding his work. On the day of Sheldon and Amy's wedding, they come up with Super Asymmetry which goes on to win them the Nobel prize.

Sheldon asks Penny if she ever paid for a meal. In the pilot, she bought the guys food since her ex boyfriend stole their clothes.

Sheldon is considering dark matter as his next field of study. He already did some research on the topic in The Pirate Solution (2009) when he hired Raj to help him with it, although this was mostly done to prevent Raj from being fired and possibly deported.

Title Reference: The revival of "Anything Can Happen Thursday", which was first established in The Hofstadter Isotope (2009).

Goofs

None

Cast

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