S02E19 - The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition
No: 36 |
Season: 2
Episode: 19 |
Air Date: 2009-03-30 |
Runtime: mins
Summary
Penny becomes jealous when a gorgeous new neighbor attracts the guys' attention.
Director and Writers
Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Steven Molaro
Script
Script: S02E19 - The Dead Hooker Juxtaposition
Quotes
Penny: What exactly is he doing up there?
Sheldon: In what I can only perceive as a tactical move to destroy me, he is with Wolowitz and Koothrapali setting up her stereo.
Penny: Oh, they're all up there are they? Typical.
Sheldon: It's axiomatically atypical. Up until recently they did not know Alicia, and had no encounters with her at her previous location. They never went upstairs to visit the former tenants. So your characterization of their behavior as typical is demonstratively fallacious.
Penny: Okay, *now* I see the giant squid head.
Howard: I got it, you're angry. You don't want to see your little bird leave the nest.
Debbie Wolowitz: Little bird? You're almost 30. Fly for God's sake!
Penny: OK, honey, did you even know the people that are moving out?
Sheldon: I've never met them, that's what made them perfect. There were no awkward hellos in the halls, there's no clickety-clacking of high-heeled shoes on hardwood floors... they may as well have been a family of cats just jumping around from drape to drape... and without that annoying ammonia urine smell.
Penny: Well, I'm sure the new people will be just as quiet.
Sheldon: You can't know that! How can you possibly know that?
Penny: You're right, I can't. You know what, anyone could rent that apartment now. An opera singer, the cast of Stomp... yeah, a tap dancing pirate with a wooden leg.
Leonard: Why are you making it worse?
Penny: I tried making it better, he wouldn't go for it.
Sheldon: (after hearing Penny mimic Alicia) Oh, mimicry. I enjoy mimicry. I've been working on Admiral Ackbar from "Return of the Jedi". "It's a trap!" You have to imagine me with a giant squid head.
Sheldon: Did you remember to ask for the chicken and broccoli to be diced, not shredded?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: Even though the menu specifies shredded?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: Brown rice, not white?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: You stop at the green grocery and get the good hot mustard?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: Did you pick up the low-sodium soy sauce from the market?
Penny: Yes.
Sheldon: Good. See how it's done, Leonard?
Alicia: I just got a call-back to audition for CSI to play a hooker who gets killed.
Leonard: Oh, I'd watch that.
Penny: Dead whore on TV, live one in real life.
Sheldon: You know, Penny, there is something that occurs in beehives that you might find interesting. Occasionally a new queen bee will arrive while the old queen is still in power. When this happens, the old queen must either locate to a new hive or engage in a battle to the death until only one queen remains.
Penny: What are you saying? That I'm threatened by Alicia, that I'm like the old queen of the hive and it's just time for me to go?
Sheldon: I'm just taking about bees. They're on the Discovery Channel. What are you talking about?
Sheldon: Do you honestly expect me to believe social protocol dictates we break our backs helping Wolowitz move and then he only need buy us a pizza?
Leonard: I'm sorry, that really is how it works.
Howard: Penny, let me take this opportunity to point out that you are looking particularly ravishing today.
Penny: Not with a thousand condoms, Howard.
Howard: So there is a number.
Leonard: (Sheldon shakes one of the boxes of the new tenant) What are you doing?
Sheldon: I'm checking for musical instruments.
(Shakes the box again)
Sheldon: Does that sound like castanets to you?
Leonard: The box says "kitchen".
Sheldon: So? Do cocaine smugglers write "cocaine" on the box?
Raj: I like Green Lantern, I'm just saying it's pretty lame that he can be defeated by the color yellow.
Sheldon: Only the modern Green Lantern is vulnerable to yellow.
Leonard: Golden Age Green Lantern was vulnerable to wood.
Raj: Great. So I can take them both out with a number 2 pencil?
Sheldon: May I interject something here?
Penny: Please!
Sheldon: You got the wrong mustard.
Howard: (Penny and Alicia are physically fighting) Oh, my God... girl fight!
(Restrains Leonard)
Leonard: What are you doing?
Howard: I know you. You are stupid enough to break it up.
Penny: Leonard and Howard and Raj... they aren't like other guys. They're special.
Alicia: Ok. They are special... and?
Penny: Let's see... how can I explain this? They don't know how to use their shields.
Alicia: Shields?
Penny: Yeah... you know like in Star Trek when you are in battle and you raise the shields?
(pause)
Penny: Where the hell'd that come from?
Notes and Trivia
The best science joke on the Internet, as Penny calls it, was written and posted online by author Kevin L. Schwartz before it went viral and reached George Smoot. Many of Schwartz's writings are available on Facebook.
The line, "The horror!", was referencing the film Apocalypse Now (1979). Penny speaks this line in a similar fashion in episode 4.17, The Toast Derivation (2011).
The pink, spotted dog seen in the milk crate during Alicia's conversation with Sheldon while she is moving in was previously seen this season on Penny's dining room table.
The title refers to the part that Alicia gets on the CSI television series and Penny's opinion of her.
Valerie Azlynn (Alicia) has, in fact, been in a CSI: NY (2004) episode, but not as a dead hooker.
Goofs
None
Cast
| Johnny Galecki | Leonard Hofstadter |
| Jim Parsons | Sheldon Cooper |
| Kaley Cuoco | Penny |
| Simon Helberg | Howard Wolowitz |
| Kunal Nayyar | Raj Koothrappali |
| Carol Ann Susi | Debbie Wolowitz |
| Valerie Azlynn | Alicia |
