S04E11 - The Justice League Recombination

No: 74  |  Season: 4   Episode: 11  |  Air Date: 2010-12-16  |  Runtime: mins

Howard: Leonard, you talk to Penny. Leonard: What makes you think I can convince her. Howard: You got her to have sex with you; obviously your super-power is brainwashing.

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Summary

The guys enter a costume contest as members of the Justice League and convince Penny and Zack to join them.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn & Maria Ferrari / Teleplay by: Bill Prady & Steven Molaro & Steve Holland

Script

Script: S04E11 - The Justice League Recombination

Quotes

Leonard: Listen, you don't have to wear the wig. At this party, we're gonna win first prize just by showing up with a girl.

Stuart: You guys finally chip in for a bodyguard?
Leonard: Uh, no. Oh, this is Zack; he's... a friend of ours. Zack, this is Stuart; he owns the store.
Zack: Wow! Lucky you.
Stuart: Yeah! I work seventy hours a week and average a dollar sixty-five an hour.
Zack: Sweet!
Stuart: Is that sarcasm?
Howard: Uh, no, it's an indictment of the American education system,

Howard: Okay, the good news is, we have a Wonder Woman.
Sheldon: Oh.
Raj: Yes.
Sheldon: What's the bad news?
Howard: Superman probably isn't getting laid tonight.
Zack: (Looks down at his Superman costume) Aw, damn.

Howard: We can still make this work. Leonard, you talk to Penny.
Leonard: What makes you think *I* can convince her.
Howard: You got her to have sex with you; obviously your super-power is brainwashing.

Penny: What the hell is wrong with you?
Sheldon: I'm The Flash. I just knocked 30,000 times.

Zack: Hold on. The costume came with a black wig.
(to Penny, sotto voce)
Zack: Where is it, babe?
Penny: No. I'm not wearing it. It looks stupid.
Zack: Come on. We're trying to win a contest here.
Penny: Forget it. I'm not wearing the wig.
Zack: Penny, there is no "I" in "Justice League."

Leonard: If it makes you feel any better, when I was dating Penny, she used to flip out on me all the time.
Zack: Whoa! You dated Penny?
Leonard: She didn't tell you?
Zack: She told me she dated a guy named Leonard; who would have thought it was you?

Howard: (in gravelly voice) I'm Batman.
Sheldon: Oh, I hardly think so. The real Caped Crusader calls his crime-fighting cohorts when he's running late.
Howard: I had to walk. I couldn't get Raj on the back of my scooter.
(Raj walks inside in his Aquaman costume with attached seahorse)
Raj: I've said this before and I'll say it again, Aquaman sucks.

Zack: (entering the comic book store) Where do they keep the Archies?
Sheldon: In the bedrooms of ten-year-old girls, where they belong.
Zack: Oh, no, you're thinking old-school Archie. It's much more sophisticated now. Like, there's two universes, and Archie's married to Betty in one and Veronica in the other. Midge is even breaking up with Moose.

Penny: I'm still mad at you.
Zack: Well, you won't be when you hear the great news.
Penny: What great news?
Zack: We're going to a costume party at the comic book store on New Years Eve, and you get to be Wonder Woman.
Sheldon: Complete with bulletproof bracelets and lasso of truth. Invisible plane sold separately.

Leonard: You can't replace me with Zack.
Sheldon: Why not? Penny did.
Howard: Yeah, she seems happier. Why wouldn't we be?

Sheldon: It occurs to me that we might have an opportunity to finally snare Best Group Costume if we shore up our weak link, which is clearly Leonard as Superman.
Leonard: Hey, I got new boots this year, guaranteed to add 3 inches.
Sheldon: That's sad. Let's ask ourselves, is there anyone we know who would make a more manly and convincing son of Krypton?
Stuart: Than Leonard in high-heel boots? Howard's mother in high-heel boots?

Leonard: Were we bullying Zack?
Howard: No, I know bullying. He left here unswirlied and his ass crack was underpants-free.
Raj: And nobody drew a penis on his forehead.
Leonard: That happened to you?
Raj: First day of cricket camp. They drew it so the testicles were my eyes.

Howard: Check it out; those guys are breaking into that car'
Leonard: What should we do?
Sheldon: We're the Justice League of America. There's only one thing we *can* do: turn around and slowly walk away.

Zack: You know, I saw this great thing on the Discovery Channel. Turns out that if you kill a starfish, it'll just come back to life.
Sheldon: Was the starfish wearing boxer shorts? Because you might have been watching Nickelodeon.
Zack: No, I'm almost sure that it was the Discovery Channel. It was a great show. They also said dolphins might be smarter than people.
Leonard: They might be smarter than some people.
Zack: Maybe we can do an experiment to find out.
Sheldon: That's easy enough. We need a large tank of water, a hoop to jump through, and a bucket of whatever bite-sized treats you find tasty.
(the guys laugh at him)
Zack: I don't get it.
Leonard: A dolphin might.
Zack: Oh, I see. You guys are inferring that I'm stupid.
Sheldon: That's not correct. We were implying it. You then inferred it.

Penny: (after the guys make fun of Zack) You know, for a group of guys who claim to have been bullied, you can be real jerks. Shame on all of you.
(she storms out)
Raj: (having not said a word) What the hell did I do?
Penny: (poking her head back in) You laughed.

Leonard: Look, I know our winter thermostat setting is seventy-two degrees, but I'm a little warm so I'm going to turn it down.
Sheldon: (runs to the Grand Canyon as The Flash) Good Lord, how you frustrate me, Leonard Hofstadter!
(runs back to the apartment and becomes himself)
Sheldon: Fine.

Leonard: Fine, if Zack's going to be Superman, I want to be Green Lantern.
Raj: But I'm Green Lantern.
Leonard: You can be Aquaman.
Raj: I don't want to be Aquaman. He sucks. He sucks underwater. He sucks fish pee.
Leonard: Excuse me, I believe Aquaman uses his telepathic powers to request the fish do their business elsewhere.

Sheldon: Wonder Woman was an Amazon. And Amazons tend to be very beefy gals.
Penny: Goodbye, Sheldon!
(slams the door)
Sheldon: But they're not blond, so put on your wig!

Raj: Oh, great. No Superman, no Wonder Woman? All we've got is a skinny Flash, an Indian Aquaman, a nearsighted Green Lantern, and a teeny, tiny Dark Knight.
Sheldon: Obviously, we're no longer a Justice League. We have no choice but to switch to our Muppet Baby costumes.
Raj: Ooh, I call Kermit.
Sheldon: I'm Kermit. You're Scooter.
Raj: Oh, man. Scooter sucks. He's the Aquaman of the Muppet Babies.

Zack: I haven't been to a comic book store in literally a million years.
Sheldon: Literally? Literally a million years?

Raj: (playing a card) Water Demon.
Howard: (playing a card) Ice Dragon.
Leonard: (playing a card) Lesser Warlord of Ka'a.
Sheldon: Not so fast.
(playing a card)
Sheldon: Infinite Sheldon.
Leonard: Infinite Sheldon?
Sheldon: Yes. Infinite Sheldon, it beats all other cards - and does not violate the rule against homemade cards because I made it at work.
Leonard: You understand why people don't want to play with you?
Sheldon: No. Although it's a question I've been pondering since preschool.

Zack: Look up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane.
(Zack jumps into Sheldon and Leonard's apartment in his Superman costume)
Zack: I forget the rest.
Penny: (Enters wearing a Wonder Woman costume with a low-cut top) All right. Let's get this thing over with.
Sheldon: I'm sorry. But in what universe is Wonder Woman blonde?
Howard: Relax. No one's gonna be looking at her hair.
(Penny punches Wolowitz in his shoulder)
Howard: Ow! I mean...
Howard: (in gravelly voice) Ow.

Leonard: (about apologizing to Zack) What would I even say?
Sheldon: "Zack, I'm sorry you're stupid. Have a Milk Dud."
Raj: A Milk Dud?
Sheldon: Yeah. Milk Duds, with their self-deprecating name and remarkably mild flavor are the most apologetic of the boxed candies.

Sheldon: Amy Farrah Fowler doesn't believe in wearing costumes. She isn't the free spirit I am.

Notes and Trivia

At the end of the episode, when Sheldon runs to the Grand Canyon, the song playing is The Flight of the Bumblebee " which is the theme song of another hero, The Green Hornet (1966).

Our friend the beaver was the title of Zonker Harris's college-level biology term paper in the comic strip Doonesbury.

Stuart's costume is Tom Baker's version of Doctor Who (1963) aka Doctor #4.

Goofs

None

Cast

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