S08E13 - The Anxiety Optimization

No: 172  |  Season: 8   Episode: 13  |  Air Date: 2015-01-29  |  Runtime: mins

Amy: You don't need to drive yourself crazy in order to be productive. Sheldon: Or do I? Sir Isaac Newton wrote his Principia while convinced he was an armadillo.

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Summary

When Sheldon becomes stuck in a rut with his work, the gang try to help him by raising his stress levels. Howard teases Raj with a game called "Emily or Cinnamon."

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Eric Kaplan & Maria Ferrari & Adam Faberman / Teleplay by: Jim Reynolds & Steve Holland & Tara Hernandez

Script

Script: S08E13 - The Anxiety Optimization

Quotes

Amy: You don't need to drive yourself crazy in order to be productive.
Sheldon: Or do I? Hmm? Sir Isaac Newton wrote his Principia while convinced he was an armadillo.
Amy: That's not true.
Sheldon: Maybe it is, maybe it isn't. I have been hallucinating lately.

Penny: So, whichever rep has the best sales for the quarter gets a trip for two to Hawaii.
Amy: That would be so romantic for you and Leonard.
Penny: Yeah, clearly you haven't seen him on the beach, walking around with his metal detector.
Amy: If I were going to Hawaii, I'd spend all my time at the Keck Observatory. Did you know that the telescopes there have better resolution than the Hubble?
Penny: Really?
Amy: (Amy nods)
Penny: (to Bernadette) Wanna go to Hawaii?

Howard: It's called Emily or Cinnamon. I give you actual quotes I've heard Raj say, and you guess if he was talking to his girlfriend or his dog.
Raj: Go ahead, make fun. You can't embarrass me. I've got a beautiful girlfriend and a dog who loves me so much, she drinks my bath water
Howard: Okay. Who was he talking to, Emily or Cinnamon? "I want you to know the bed feels so lonely when you're not in it."
Raj: (Leonard looks at Raj and starts chuckling) I may not be liking this game so much.

Emily: So, I hear you guys have been playing a little game.
Howard: Well, um, we were just kidding around.
Emily: Well, you may think it's funny that Raj is sweet and sensitive, but I think it's sexy.
(kisses Raj)
Emily: Ugh, why is there dog hair in your mouth?

Leonard: OK, we're headed out. See you later.
Sheldon: I know. Before you leave, can you help me test these noise cancelling headphones?
Leonard: Yeah, sure.
Sheldon: (Sheldon puts on headphones) Go ahead.
Leonard: Hello, can you hear me?
(Sheldon doesn't react)
Leonard: Sheldon, I haven't changed the filter in the water pitcher in two years.
Penny: Uh, Bernadette's nickname for you is the Virgin Pina Colada.
Leonard: Your George Lucas autograph is really a me autograph.
Penny: Yeah, well, once I was too lazy to walk across the hall so I used your toothbrush.
Leonard: Ooh, and at one time when you were asleep Amy totally took off her-
(Sheldon takes off headphones)
Leonard: And that's why you're the best roommate ever.
Sheldon: Aaaaw. Now I'm sad I didn't hear it.

Sheldon: I don't want to tell you how to do your job, but when a mouse completes a maze, it gets a food pellet.
Amy: It also gets its brain plucked out with tweezers.
Sheldon: And its last meal was a food pellet? You're a monster.

Sheldon: You sounded in distress. I was worried something unpleasant was happening to you. Like a murder, or spontaneous coitus with Leonard.

Penny: Have fun.
Sheldon: Oh, I will. Nothing more fun than a paradigm-shifting evening of science.
Penny: (to Leonard) And you thought it was soaping me up in the shower.

Penny: What exactly do you think goes on here?
Sheldon: Conversations you wouldn't be comfortable having in front of the opposite sex, who has the best cervix? Which sanitary napkin is all the rage, men's buttocks and how you want to pad and squeeze them
Bernadette: We were talking about Penny's job
Sheldon: And how difficult is to do when she's bloated cranky and crampy, continue
Penny: We are just people, we talk about the same things you guys talk about
Sheldon: You talk about if werewolves can swim? Leonard says yes, I say it depends on if the human could swim before he was bitten
Penny: Let's just talk about our periods
Amy: Hold on, all cannines can swim, why would werewolves be any different?
Bernadette: They're not a hundred per cent werewolf, they're part human, it's like comparing apples to oranges
Sheldon: Thank you although in this case it'd be like comparing apples to were oranges who only turned on a full moon

Raj: Where's Sheldon?
Penny: Date night.
Leonard: That can't be much fun for Amy. You know, at work today he tried his first Red Bull?
Bernadette: What happened?
Leonard: He chased a squirrel around the quad for a while... and then threw up in my car.

Raj: I think it's a little weird that you remember me saying all these things, Maybe the truth is you're jealous about my relationships.
Howard: Uh, maybe I am. Who wouldn't want to be the girl, or possibly dog, to hear the words "You're so lucky, you have the shiniest hair."
Leonard: That's a tough one, I know he brushes both of them

Leonard: What is going on?
Sheldon: Oh, I need to keep my anxiety at the right level, so I'm using Darth Vader, the Joker and Godzilla's roar to keep me in that sweet spot. Yeah, I tried including Taylor Swift in the mix, but turned out I love her.
Leonard: At least listen to it through headphones. I'm trying to sleep. Good night.
Sheldon: Boy! Taylor was right; haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate.

Notes and Trivia

It is revealed that Sheldon realizes he likes Taylor Swift. When he quotes her by saying "haters gonna hate, hate, hate, hate, hate", he references her song 'Shake It Off'.

Title Reference: Sheldon wants to reach his optimum anxiety level to improve his work performance.

Goofs

None

Cast

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