S12E15 - The Donation Oscillation

No: 270  |  Season: 12   Episode: 15  |  Air Date: 2019-02-07  |  Runtime: mins

Leonard: Penny, I-I know what you're doing. Just please stop. Penny: Ooh, listen to this. "Bam. "Pow. Take that, Batman."

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Summary

Penny tries to throw a wrench into Leonard's plan to be a sperm donor for her ex-boyfriend; Wolowitz, Bernadette, Anu and Koothrappali turn Koothrappali's canceled bachelor party into a couple's trip aboard the "vomit comet."

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Bill Prady & Jeremy Howe & Adam Faberman / Teleplay by: Steve Holland & Dave Goetsch & Maria Ferrari

Script

Script: S12E15 - The Donation Oscillation

Quotes

Penny: What are those?
Leonard: Vitamins. Zack wants me to take them to increase my virility.
Penny: Zack used the word "virility"?
Leonard: He may have said "wiener power".

Howard: Since you really, really want to go, I'll stay here.
Bernadette: Oh great.
Howard: Unless you don't want to, because I was right and I do know you.
Bernadette: Well, if you really know me, then you know how far I'll go to prove a point.
Howard: Apparently 34000 feet that way, then straight back down, up and down, over and over again until you throw up food you didn't even eat.

Amy: Sheldon! Come home! They don't want to have YOUR baby.

Leonard: I know someone who might be interested.
Amy: (In the Cooper apartment, to Sheldon) No. Absolutely not!
Sheldon: (on the phone, to Zack) I'm sorry. My wife says I'm not allowed.

Sheldon: So you're willing to go through with this, even though she clearly has reservations?
Leonard: If she has a problem, she should say something.
Sheldon: She tried to seduce you. If that's not a cry for help, I don't know what is.

Amy: This isn't gonna make you a dad. It's gonna be their baby, not yours.
Sheldon: Although, some day, if that kid want's to know why he's short, near-sighted, and asthmatic, he may hunt you down.

Penny: Can I get you something to drink? Maybe a beer?
Wyatt: Sure, if you're having one.
Penny: Okay.
Wyatt: And why wouldn't you, since you're not pregnant?

Penny: Okay, that's my dad. Now remember, don't bring up any baby stuff. All right? Not me wanting one, not you having one with Zack.
Leonard: Got it.
Penny: And if he brings it up, just change the subject to literally anything else.
Leonard: Got it.
Penny: But not the Cornhuskers, do not discuss the Cornhuskers.
Penny, Leonard: Is that a sports team?
Penny: Never mind, you're good.

Wyatt: You think you're mad at me and Leonard, but maybe you're really mad at yourself.
Penny: Why would I be mad at myself?
Wyatt: Cause your regret this "no baby" plan of yours.
Penny: You know it's pretty crappy of you to make me feel bad about this.
Wyatt: I'm not trying to make you feel bad. But... do you?
Penny: Yes. I feel like I'm letting everyone down. Hate disappointing Leonard, but I really hate disappointing you.
Wyatt: Oh, Slugger, you could never disappoint me. Okay, your high school years were a little rough.
Penny: And I'm sorry about that.
Wyatt: There was you sneaking out at night and your boyfriends sneaking out in the morning.
Penny: I said sorry.
Wyatt: That time you got drunk and stole the horse.
Penny: Yeah. I was there. I remember. Parts of it.
Wyatt: But besides all that, being your dad is the best thing ever happenned to me.
Penny: What about Lisa and Randall?
Wyatt: They're okay. And I don't want you to miss out.
Penny: I know.
Wyatt: But if this is really what you want, or don't want, I'm on your side.
Penny: Thanks.

Bernadette: (Floating) I hate this so much! Why am I doing this?
Anu: To prove a stupid point to your husband.
Bernadette: Oh right. Worth it.

Bernadette: I'm a thrill-seeker, too. I've had to pull back since I became a mom, but I'll still jump on the back of a grocery cart and just roll through the meat section.
Howard: And I'm married to her, which is quite the ride.

Notes and Trivia

Final appearance of Penny's ex-boyfriend Zack Johnson (Brian Thomas Smith).

The last episode to feature Keith Carradine as Penny's dad, Wyatt.

The name of Penny's sister Lisa is finally revealed, although she never appeared on screen.

The reference Sheldon made to the Underdog balloon getting away at Macy's parade was also used as part of a comedy sketch in the first season of Friends (1994).

Goofs

None

Cast

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