S01E11 - The Pancake Batter Anomaly

No: 11  |  Season: 1   Episode: 11  |  Air Date: 2008-03-31  |  Runtime: mins

Soft kitty, warm kitty... little ball of fur.

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Summary

When Sheldon gets sick, Leonard, Howard and Raj go AWOL, leaving a reluctant Penny to deal with him.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Chuck Lorre & Lee Aronsohn / Teleplay by: Bill Prady & Stephen Engel

Script

Script: S01E11 - The Pancake Batter Anomaly

Quotes

Penny: Okay, no sponge baths, and definitely no enema.
(Beat of silence)
Sheldon: Agreed.

Sheldon: (he blows his nose very loudly and a family at the table next to him stares)
(showing them the tissue)
Sheldon: Would you call this moss green or forest green?

Sheldon: Can you sing "Soft Kitty".
Penny: What?
Sheldon: My mom used to sing it to me when I was sick.
Penny: I'm sorry, honey, I don't know it.
Sheldon: I'll teach you. "Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur, happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr purr purr." Now you.
Penny: Soft kitty, warm kitty...
Sheldon: Little ball of fur. Keep rubbing.
Penny: (angry) Little ball of fur.

Sheldon: Well, just as I predicted, I am sick! My fever has been tracking up exponentially since 2:00 AM, and I am producing sputum and an alarming rate.
(Coughs)
Leonard: No kidding?
Sheldon: Nope. And it has shifted from clear to milky green.

Sheldon: The nurse who worked there didn't speak any English, but when I finally managed to convince her I was sick, she said, "M?chtest Du eine Darmsp?lung?"
Penny: What does that mean?
Sheldon: Well, based on what happened next, she probably said, "Would you like an enema?"

Raj: How about Lasik?
Leonard: You want me to get eye surgery?
Raj: Would you rather go back to the apartment and deal with Sheldon or have a stranger carve up your corneas with a laser beam?
(Leonard doesn't respond)
Howard: Well?
Leonard: I'm thinking!

Leonard: How was Nebraska?
Penny: Oh, better than North Dakota.
(pause)
Penny: Guess that joke's only funny in Nebraska.
Sheldon: From the data at hand, you really can't draw that conclusion. All you can say with absolute certainty is that that joke is not funny here.

Penny: You are a grown man. Haven't you ever been sick before?
Sheldon: Of course. But not by myself.
Penny: Really? Never?
Sheldon: Well, once, when I was fifteen and spending the summer at the Heidelberg Institute in Germany.
Penny: Studying abroad?
Sheldon: No, visiting professor. Anyway, the local cuisine was a little more sausage-based than I'm used to, and the result was an internal blitzkrieg, with my lower intestine playing the part of Czechoslovakia.

Sheldon: We have no idea what pathogen Typhoid Penny has introduced into our environment. And having never been to Nebraska, I'm fairly certain that I have no cornhusking antibodies.

Sheldon: Wait.
(hands Leonard a measuring cup)
Sheldon: Put this in the bathroom.
Leonard: What for?
Sheldon: I need to measure my fluid intake and output to make sure my kidneys aren't shutting down.
Leonard: I mix pancake batter in this!
Sheldon: No, that measuring cup has always been for urine.
Leonard: You had time to make a label for everything in this apartment, including the label maker, but you didn't have ten seconds to make one that said urine cup?
Sheldon: It's right here on the bottom.
Leonard: Oh. I guess I owe the Betty Crocker company a letter of apology.

Howard: (on the phone with Leonard) Hang on, call waiting.
Leonard: No, don't, don't...
Howard: (switches over) Hello?
Sheldon: Howard, I'm sick.
Howard: Uh.
(imitating his mother)
Howard: Howard's sleeping, this is his mother. Why are you calling at this ungodly hour?
Sheldon: I need soup.
Howard: (still imitating his mother) Then call your own mother.

Sheldon: If influenza was only contagious after symptoms appeared, it would have died out thousands of years ago. Somewhere between tool using and cave painting, homo habilis would have figured out to kill the guy with the runny nose.

Leonard: Alright, well, get some rest and drink plenty of fluids!
Sheldon: What else would I drink? Gasses? Solids? Ionized plasma?

Sheldon: Checkmate.
Leonard: Aaow! Again?
Sheldon: Obviously, you're not well-suited for three-dimensional chess. Perhaps three-dimensional Candy Land would be more your speed.
Leonard: Just reset the board.
Sheldon: It must be humbling to suck on so many different levels.

Penny: (Catching Leonard trying to sneak back in for his spare pair of glasses) You rat bastard!

Cheryl: Homeless crazy guy at table 18.
(Sheldon, in heavy clothing, blows his nose loudly)
Penny: No, just crazy.

Leonard: What the hell are you doing?
Sheldon: I'm making Petri dishes to grow throat cultures.
Leonard: With lime Jello?
Sheldon: I need a growth medium, and *someone* polished off the apricot yogurt.

Sheldon: Usually, when I'm sick my mother always makes me this split-pea with frankfurter slices and homemade croutons.

(Sheldon, obviously sick, orders soup in the restaurant where Penny is working)
Penny: Why didn't you just have soup at home?
Sheldon: Penny, I have an IQ of 187. Don't you imagine that if there were a way for me to have had soup at home, I would have thought of it?
Penny: You can have soup delivered.
Sheldon: I did not think of that.

Howard: (Leonard, Howard and Rajesh arrived at the theater wearing chimp masks, and they see that EVERYONE ELSE is wearing chimp masks)
(disappointed)
Howard: Look at this, *everyone* went chimp.
Raj: For the record, I voted for orangutan, but you guys shouted me down.

Sheldon: Do you think Penny will come here and take care of us?
Leonard: I don't think Penny's ever coming here again.
Sheldon: I'm very congested.
Leonard: Yeah, so?
Sheldon: Could you go to the kitchen, and get me the turkey baster labelled mucous?
Leonard: If I stand, I'll vomit.
Sheldon: Under the sink, yellow Tupperware bowl.

Howard: Take your stinking paws off my popcorn, you damn, dirty ape!

Leonard: Howard, it's Leonard. Code milky green.
Howard: Dear Lord, not milky green.

Debbie Wolowitz: (phone rings) HOWARD, IT'S THE PHONE!
Howard: (waking up) I know it's the phone, Ma I HEAR the phone!
Debbie Wolowitz: WHO'S CALLING THAT THIS UNGODLY HOUR?
Howard: I don't know!
Debbie Wolowitz: WELL ASK THEM *WHY* THEY'RE CALLING THAT THIS UNGODLY HOUR!
Howard: How can I ask them when I'M TALKING TO YOU?
(answers phone)
Howard: Hello?
Leonard: Howard, it's Leonard. Code milky green.
Howard: Dear lord, not milky green!
Leonard: Affirmative. With fever.
Debbie Wolowitz: WHO'S ON THE PHONE?
Howard: It's Leonard!
Debbie Wolowitz: WHY IS HE CALLING?
Howard: Sheldon's sick!
Debbie Wolowitz: WERE YOU PLAYING WITH HIM?
Howard: For God's sake, Ma! I'm 26 years old!
Debbie Wolowitz: (sarcastic) EXCUSE ME, MR GROWN-UP!
(Changing subject)
Debbie Wolowitz: WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR BREAKFAST!
Howard: (irritated) CHOCOLATE MILK AND EGGOS! PLEASE!

Notes and Trivia

Leonard (Johnny Galecki), Howard (Simon Helberg) and Raj (Kunal Nayyar) attend a Planet of the Apes marathon in an effort to avoid Sheldon (Jim Parsons) when he is sick. Before the Marathon begins Leonard cracks his glasses which is reminiscent of the classic The Twilight Zone (1959) episode, Time Enough at Last (1959), which was penned by Rod Serling. Serling also wrote the screenplay for the original Planet of the Apes (1974).

Sheldon refers to Penny as "Typhoid Penny" when inquiring as to which pathogen she has introduced as an analogy to "Typhoid Mary". Mary Mallon was a carrier of typhoid fever and many people she came into contact with died of it, although she showed no symptoms.

Sheldon tells Penny that he has an IQ of 187.

The domed building visible from Leonard and Sheldon's apartment window is the Pasadena City Hall.

The pseudoscalar meson nonet is clearly seen on the small refrigerator blackboard, which is what Eric Gablehauser was "doodling" in The Luminous Fish Effect (2007).

The three-dimensional chess game was often seen in Star Trek: The Next Generation (1987), one of Leonard and Sheldon's favorite shows. Cast members Wil Wheaton, LeVar Burton and Brent Spiner would make cameos later in the series, with Wheaton having a recurring role. It was also used in the original Star Trek (1966) series as well.

The waitress who warns Penny about the "homeless crazy guy at table 18" is the same woman who Raj met and went home with at Penny's Halloween party in The Middle Earth Paradigm (2007).

This is the first time Sheldon makes Penny sing "Soft Kitty" for him (a lullaby that Sheldon's mother used to sing him when he was sick). The tune is sung again in several subsequent episodes, including one (The Adhesive Duck Deficiency (2009)) where Penny turns the tables on Sheldon and makes him sing "Soft Kitty" to her.

Goofs

None

Cast

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