S06E18 - The Contractual Obligation Implementation

No: 129  |  Season: 6   Episode: 18  |  Air Date: 2013-03-07  |  Runtime: mins

Amy: I've never played hookey in my life. My mom said that's how girls end up addicted to reefer and jazz music. Penny: More like how girls end up at a Best Western hotel with a thirty-four-year-old guy named Luther.

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Summary

Leonard, Sheldon and Howard give lectures on science to junior high students. The girls ditch work to go to Disneyland. Raj devises a date for Lucy that fixes their social anxiety problems.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Chuck Lorre & Eric Kaplan & Steve Holland / Teleplay by: Steven Molaro & Jim Reynolds & Maria Ferrari

Script

Script: S06E18 - The Contractual Obligation Implementation

Quotes

Amy: (Lying on the couch, dressed as Snow White) Sheldon, all Snow White needs is one kiss to wake up.
Sheldon: (Sitting at his desk) I heard you the first time.

Amy: I can't believe I ditched work for Disneyland.
Bernadette: What did you tell your boss?
Amy: Oh, I was very clever. I did it in stages. At 7:00 last night, I called about a problem at the lab and casually mentioned I was going out for seafood. At 9:30, I called and told him that one of my scallops tasted weird. At 11:30, I called and said I was throwing up like a firehose. at 12:45, I called and made nothing but dry heaving sounds. And now I'm going to Disneyland!
Bernadette: Penny, what did you say?
Penny: I work at the Cheesecake Factory. I said, bye.

Raj: (Texting) My father's a gynecologist, so if you're ever in India and you need a "check-up", my father is, as he likes to say, at your cervix.
Lucy: (Texting) That's terrible. Your father should be in a pun-itentiary.
Raj: (Texting) That is a fitting pun-ishment. I still don't know what you do for a living.
Lucy: (Texting) Web design.
Raj: (Texting) Anything I might have seen?
Lucy: (Texting) I don't know. You ever look at porn websites?
Raj: (Texting) No, never. What is porn?
Lucy: Sorry, auto-correct. That was supposed to say prom websites.
Raj: Ooh, fun. I love prom. The romance, the gowns, it's like a fairy tale come to life.
(Lucy looks at Raj funny)
Raj: Sorry, auto-correct. That was supposed to say, I like sports.

Sheldon: I suppose there is a history of professional women using their initials so as not to be prejudged: Harry Potter's J.K. Rowling... uh, Star Trek's D.C. Fontana...
Howard: Van Nuys pole dancer D.D. Melons.

Leonard: Nice of your school to let us talk to girls about science.
Howard: Yeah. They're very excited to hear from their most famous student, except for the serial killer that ate all those prostitutes.
Sheldon: Must be exciting to come back to your alma mater as an astronaut.
Howard: I know. I left here a skinny nerd...
Leonard: And now you're also an astronaut.

Sheldon: Oh, hold on. While I'm comfortable speaking about science, I'm not sure I know how to spark the interest of school children. Better Google it.
Howard: What exactly are you looking up?
Sheldon: (Types) How do I get twelve-year-old girls excited?
Leonard, Howard: Nooo!

Penny: You brought fancy wine and made fondu; I've slept with guys for less.
(Amy, Bernadette and Raj stare at her)
Penny: It's a joke! Based on real events.

Howard: Bernie, I'm home. Did you have fun today?
Bernadette: Yes, and I have a surprise for you.
Howard: Please be Cinderella. Please be Cinderella.
Bernadette: (Appears dressed as Cinderella) Hello, my handsome prince.
Howard: Milady.
(Mimes riding a horse to her)

Raj: I don't know about Disneyland. With the crowds and the weird characters walking around, it reminds me too much of India.

Bernadette: Why don't you take her to Disneyland? You go on Space Mountain; you're in the dark; she's holding on to you...
Penny: Yeah, but you've just have to remember that ride is shorter than you think and they take a picture of you at the end, so make sure you got all your clothes back on.
(Amy & Bernadette stare at her)
Penny: It's a *joke*! Based on real events.

Leonard: We're supposed to be encouraging women to study science. Can you at least play a less sexist game?
Sheldon: I don't see anything sexist. She can handle a battleaxe as well as any man.
Howard: And she has mammary glands that can breast feed a family of thirty and have enough milk left over to open a Baskin-Robbins.
Sheldon: Mother, warrior princess, small business owner, I see glass ceilings shattering all over the place.

Sheldon: Well, I think this whole thing is a waste of time.
Leonard: You mean helping women get interested in science?
Sheldon: No, helping anyone. People should be able to take care of themselves.
Leonard: You mean like when I drove you to the pharmacy, the dry cleaners and the post office?
Sheldon: I'm not against people using tools. Even an otter picks up a rock once in a while to open a clam.

Amy: I haven't been to Disneyland since I was a kid; we should definitely go one weekend.
Bernadette: Weekends are too crowded.
Penny: So blow off work. Go on a weekday.
Amy: Hookey? I've never played hookey in my life. My mom said that's how girls end up addicted to reefer and jazz music.
Penny: More like how girls end up at a Best Western hotel with a thirty-four-year-old guy named Luther.
Bernadette: Joke?
Penny: I can laugh about it now.

Bernadette: We can't all be Cinderella.
Amy: How do we decide?
Bernadette: Simple. I came up with the idea, so I get to be Cinderella. Any of you bitches have a problem with that, I can stop the car right now!

Amy: (Amy is lying on the couch in a Snow White costume) Sheldon, all Snow White needs is one little kiss to wake up.
Sheldon: Heard you the first time.

Leonard: (Enters) Hey, so how was... Huh?
Penny: (Dressed as Sleeping Beauty) I can explain. I played hooky with the girls and we went to Disneyland and got... What are you doing?
Leonard: (Undressing) I'm listening, keep going.

Sheldon: I believe in a gender-blind society like in Star Trek, where women and men of all races and creeds worked side by side as equals.
Leonard: You mean where they were advanced enough to invent an inter-stellar warp drive but a black lady still answered the space phone?
Howard: Oh, I did spend a lot of my shower time with Lieutenant Uhura.

Leonard: Look, I know you guys don't want to do this but we have no choice, so you can either bitch and whine, or we can just get it over with.
Howard: I got whine.
Sheldon: I got the 'b' word.
Leonard: Yeah, well, it's in our contract to serve on a university committee, and frankly this is one I believe in. Okay, here we go. 'Encouraging more women to pursue a career in the sciences.'
Howard: C'mon, if I was any good at convincing women to do stuff, I wouldn't have spent so much of my twenties in the shower.

Sheldon: Hello, female children. Allow me to inspire you with a story about a great female scientist. Polish-born, French-educated, Madame Curie. Co-discoverer of radioactivity, she was a hero of science... until her hair fell out, her vomit and stool became filled with blood, and she was poisoned to death by her own discovery. With a little hard work, I see no reason why that can't happen to any of you.

Notes and Trivia

Sheldon mentions "professional women using their initials so as not to be prejudged", and names J.K. Rowling and Star Trek's D.C. Fontana as examples. Dorothy Fontana was a very prolific writer on several Star Trek series, but when she began writing for Star Trek (1966), creator Gene Roddenberry indeed advised her to submit screenplays using her initials "D.C.", as networks and studio executives in the 1960s were generally very biased against women writing science-fiction. The real Fontana had actually made a cameo appearance in The Russian Rocket Reaction (2011). Harry Potter author Joanne Rowling was asked by her publisher to use initials, out of fear that the target audience of young boys might be put off by books written by a woman. Even in later years, when Fontana and Rowling became well-known and established writers, they often kept using their better-known initials rather than their full name.

The first appearance of Bert (Brian Posehn), who would later reappear in the season 7 episode The Occupation Recalibration (2014) where he has a crush on Amy.

The girls dress up as Disney princesses. Bernadette is Cinderella, Penny is Sleeping Beauty, and Amy is Snow White.

Goofs

None

Cast

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