S07E06 - The Romance Resonance

No: 141  |  Season: 7   Episode: 6  |  Air Date: 2013-10-24  |  Runtime: mins

Amy: So you just got lucky? Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not get lucky. Amy: You and me both, brother.

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Summary

Howard plans something special to celebrate the anniversary of his first date with Bernadette. Sheldon is conflicted when he makes a major scientific breakthrough but some details have to be corrected.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Eric Kaplan & Jim Reynolds & Tara Hernandez / Teleplay by: Steven Molaro & Steve Holland & Maria Ferrari

Script

Script: S07E06 - The Romance Resonance

Quotes

Penny: How come you've never done anything romantic to celebrate our first date?
Leonard: Oh, for starters, you've broken up with me so many times, which first date are we talking about?
Sheldon: Ooh, somebody call the burn ward.

Sheldon: (reflecting happily on the news that Chinese scientists have seemingly confirmed his latest hypothesis) I like China. They know how to keep people in line.

Sheldon: Leonard, this is going to haunt me for the rest of my life. Every science classroom, every periodic table, every textbook, this mistake will be staring back at me, like that time you let Koothrappali wax your eyebrows. I've got to find a way to stop this thing.
Leonard: Buddy, I don't think you can. I mean, once it's out there, it's out there. This thing is like the science equivalent of a sex tape.
Sheldon: You know, frankly I'd prefer a sex tape.
Leonard: You don't know what a sex tape is, do you?
Sheldon: No.

Sheldon: Oh great. Now I'm worse than a fraud. I'm practically a biologist.

Sheldon: This is the very copy of the Handbook of Chemistry and Physics in which I looked up the reaction rates of mendelevium and...
Amy: And what?
Sheldon: No. No, no, no, no.
Amy: What's wrong?
Sheldon: I've made a horrible mistake.
Amy: What are you talking about?
Sheldon: This table. It's in square centimeters. I read it as square meters. Do you know what that means?
Amy: That Americans can't handle the metric system?
Sheldon: Amy, I was off by a factor of ten thousand.
Amy: But the Chinese team found the element.
Sheldon: Well, they shouldn't have, my calculations were wrong. There must be some resonance between the elements I didn't know about.
Amy: So, you just got lucky?.
Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not get lucky!
Amy: (mutters) You and me both, brother.
(aloud)
Amy: It doesn't matter. The element was found because of you and that's ground breaking.
Sheldon: What matters is the greatest scientific achievement of my life is based on a blunder. I'm not a genius. I'm a fraud.

Sheldon: Stop it! I don't need to take this admiration from the likes of you people. How do I make them stop loving me?
Leonard: Invite them to live with us.

Howard: Next week is the anniversary of my first date with Bernadette.
Sheldon: *Really* don't care.
Howard: I want to do something special and I was hoping you guys could be a part of it.
Penny: Aah, what horrible thing you trying to make up for?
Howard: Just putting something in the bank for what horrible thing I do next.

Leonard: Hey, I get that you feel bad about all the attention, but still what you did is amazing. We're really proud of you.
Amy: I'm not.
Sheldon: You're not?
Amy: Sheldon, I've been thinking about it, and you're right. You don't deserve any credit. All you did was misread some numbers on a table. A very easy table, too. Honestly, I'm embarrassed for you.
Sheldon: That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard.
Penny: Dammit, everyone's better at this than me.
Sheldon: Congratulations, Dr. Fowler, you just made the fort.
Amy: Yes!
(Smiles)

Raj: As I'm sure you're aware, the quickest way to a man's heart is through his...
Penny: Pants! But Leonard says sex doesn't count.
Raj: Hnh. You poor thing. You have one arrow in your quiver, and you just can't use it.

Penny: Boy, Bernadette is gonna love this.
Leonard: Oh yeah, it must be nice for someone to do something so romantic.
Penny: Okay, you know what's not romantic? Rubbing it in someone's face
Leonard: Actually, it can be, but I told you sex doesn't count.

Sheldon: It's all I can think about is how much I want to kiss you.

Raj: You're young and beautiful and men are always throwing themselves at you.
Penny: Yeah, I'm trying to be sad about that; I can't.

Penny: You know, I can be romantic if I want to.
Leonard: It's fine. And also not true.
Penny: OK, just you wait and see; I'm going to romance your fricking ass off.
Leonard: That's beautiful- is that Shakespeare?

Leonard: I do romantic things for you all the time; can you even name one romantic thing you've done for me?
Penny: I can name tons!
Leonard: Sex doesn't count.
Penny: Oh.
(thinks)
Penny: I know; what about that bed and breakfast?
Leonard: Well, I took you there. All you did wa...
Penny: I know what I did.
(pause)
Penny: I bet they had to throw out that rocking chair.

Leonard: I have to say this is the best Top Ramen you've ever made.
Penny: I discovered a secret ingredient. The flavor packet. That sucker is well named. All right, lover boy. Get ready, fcause there is a crap storm of romance coming your way.
Leonard: Stop it, you're going to make me cry.
(Penny turns on romantic music)
Leonard: All right. You seem pretty confident.
Penny: Oh, I am. Maybe if you follow this trail, you'll see why.
Leonard: Ohhh, rose petals.
Penny: Yes. The most beautiful, and shockingly expensive, of all the flowers.
Leonard: You made the bed; you really are pulling out all the stops.
Penny: OK, I gave this a lot of thought, and I finally found something to show you how much I love you.
Leonard: (he unwraps the gift) Oh, wow.
Penny: It's a first edition of "Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy". I remember it was your favorite book growing up.
Leonard: This is great. It... Thank you. Hnh... So much.
Penny: What?
Penny: Nothing. I love it.
Penny: No. Something's going on. What's wrong with it? I remember you saying how great it would be to have a first edition.
Leonard: It's true. I-I did, I did say that... when we were at the used book store together, and I saw the first edition and I bought it.
Penny: Oh my God. I am the worst.
Leonard: It's okay. It's really thoughtful.
Penny: No, it's not... I mean... What's thoughtful is everything you do. Here, you know what? Look at this. Look, here's the... the plane ticket you bought me when I was too poor to go home for the holidays. And the rose you left on my windshield... just because. Here's the... the thank-you letter you wrote me after the first time I slept with you. All eleven pages of it.
Leonard: Can't believe you saved all this stuff.
Penny: Of course I did. It's you.
Leonard: Come here.
Penny: Mm
(they kiss)
Penny: Oh.
Leonard: Is that a pregnancy test?
Penny: Oh yeah, just the first one; I didn't save them all.

Sheldon: I'm being given credit that I don't deserve.
Leonard: Oh, people get things they don't deserve all the time. Look at me with you.

(sung lyrics to "If I Didn't Have You aka Bernadette's Song")
Howard: (verse 1) If I didn't have you, life would be blue. I'd be Doctor Who without the TARDIS.
Sheldon: (spoken aside to Amy about Bernadette) Is it me, or does she not look so good?
Amy: (spoken aside back to Sheldon) Shhh!
Howard: (continuation of verse 1) A candle without a wick, a Watson without a Crick, I'd be one of my outfits without a dicky. I'd be cheese without the mac, Jobs without the Wozniak, I'd be solving exponential equations that use bases not found on your calculator making them much harder to crack. I'd be an atom without a bomb, a dot without the com, and I'd probably still live with my mom.
Sheldon, Amy, Leonard, Penny, Raj: And he'd probably still live with his mom.
Howard: (chorus 1) Ever since I met you, you turned my world around. You supported all my dreams and all my hopes. You're like uranium-235, and I'm uranium-238; almost inseparable isotopes. I couldn't have imagined how good my life would get, from the moment that I met you, Bernadette.
Bernadette: (spoken) Oh, Howie!
Howard: (verse 2) If I didn't have you, life would be dreary. I'd be string theory without any string. I'd be binary code without a one, a cathode ray tube without an electron gun. I'd be Firefly, Buffy and Avengers without Joss Whedon. I'd speak a lot more Klingon, Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam.
Sheldon, Amy, Leonard, Penny, Raj: And he'd definitely still live with his mom.
Howard: (chorus 2) Ever since I met you, you turned my world around. You're my best friend and my lover. We're like changing electric and magnetic fields, you can't have one without the other. I couldn't have imagined how good my life would get, from the moment that I met you, Bernadette.
Howard, Sheldon, Amy, Leonard, Penny, Raj: Oh, we couldn't have imagined how good our lives would get, from the moment that we met you, Bernadette.

Sheldon: Amy. Amy. Did you hear what I said?
Amy: Can't talk. In the zone.

Bernadette: Great news! A raccoon virus just crossed the species barrier and now it can infect humans.
Raj: Why is that great news?
Bernadette: In the pharmaceutical business we have a saying: "Mo' infection, mo' money."

Penny: What're you working on?
Sheldon: Can't talk. In the zone.
Penny: (to Amy) Do you know what he's doing?
Amy: Could be anything. Last time he was like this he figured out electron transport in graphene. Time before that he was making a list of who's allowed in his tree fort if he ever gets one. Still can't believe I didn't make the cut.
Penny: Uh, Sheldon, you wanna take a break? Your food's ready.
Leonard: Eh, what are you doing? He's both happy and quiet. Like seeing a unicorn and Bigfoot at the same time.

Notes and Trivia

Bernadette's Song was written by the comedic band Garfunkel & Oates, consisting of Kate Micucci who played Raj's girlfriend Lucy in season 6, and Riki Lindhome, who played Ramona Nowitzki in The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem (2008).

When Howard and the cast are serenading Bernadette who is in quarantine, the Klingon that Howard speaks in the song is "Heghlu'meH QaQ jajvam" which translates to "Today is a good day to die".

Goofs

None

Cast

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