S07E12 - The Hesitation Ramification

No: 147  |  Season: 7   Episode: 12  |  Air Date: 2014-01-02  |  Runtime: mins

Leonard: There's this thing online, you put yourself on tape and just send it in, anyone can do it.

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Summary

After Leonard tries to help Penny following a failed role on a TV show, she makes an important decision. Meanwhile, Raj and Stuart try to practice their social skills, and Sheldon navigates the intricacies of being funny.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Dave Goetsch & Jim Reynolds & Tara Hernandez / Teleplay by: Steven Molaro & Steve Holland & Maria Ferrari

Script

Script: S07E12 - The Hesitation Ramification

Quotes

Leonard: OK, listen to me. This is just a minor setback.
Penny: No, it's not, OK. I've been out here for like ten years. I've nothing to show for it.
Leonard: You have me.
Penny: You're right. I do have you. Mmm. Let's get married.
Leonard: What?
Penny: (She gets down on one knee) Wooh. Leonard Hofstadter... will you marry me?
Leonard: Ummm.
Penny: Did you seriously just say, "Ummm"?
Leonard: You know I love you, but but you're, you're drunk and sad and feeling lost...
Penny: OK, so... ugh... you don't want to marry me?
Leonard: That is not what I said.
Penny: No, forget it. I take it back. Offer's off the table.
Sheldon: Who's in the mood to laugh?
Leonard: Really not a good time.
Sheldon: But I used science to construct the perfect joke.
Penny: I'm gonna go.
Leonard: Ah, Penny don't.
Penny: No, no. I just need to be alone.

Penny: Are you kidding me?
Leonard: What's wrong?
Penny: Well... the diner scene. Where's my diner scene?
Sheldon: Well, don't ask me. Until I see the prequel, I'm lost.
Penny: No. There's supposed to be a big scene with me and Mark Harmon, but it-it's... gone.
Bernadette: What happened?
Penny: They must have cut it.
Leonard: Oh, Penny. I'm, I'm sorry.
Howard: That stinks.
Raj: I'm sure you were great.
Penny: This doesn't make any sense to me. I, I thought, I thought I did a really good job, and... Excuse me.

Leonard: What you're trying to do is hard, but people do make it. And I really do believe that you could be one of 'em.
Penny: Thank you.
Leonard: And, to show you how much I believe in you, I kind of got you an audition
Penny: Are you serious? For what?
Leonard: The new Star Wars movie.
Penny: What! How did you manage that?
Leonard: There's a thing online. You put yourself on tape and just send it in. Anyone can do it.
Penny: Come on, Leonard, this is just a PR stunt.
Leonard: So, uh, even if it is, you have a huge advantage because you're an actual actress; most of the people doing this are just weirdos and nerds. Wolowitz sent his in two days ago.

Leonard: Yes. How much for, uh, a hundred long stemmed red roses? Really? How much for three?
Penny: Hey.
Leonard: Yeah, I'll call you back.
Penny: Look, I know you were just trying to help with your Star Wars thing. I didn't mean to call it idiotic.
Leonard: Well, I don't think you called it idiotic.
Penny: Oh. Sorry, I meant to. Anyway, um. I was just upset with myself. I wasn't mad at you. Just feel like everything is falling apart.
Leonard: Oh, come on; it's OK.
Penny: No, it's not OK. Look at me. OK. I took a temp job as a waitress forever ago, and still doing it. I can't quit because guess what, I can't do anything else. And I finally get ybig break and it goes away. I'm such a mess.
Leonard: No, you're not.
Penny: Really? Cause this morning at Starbucks a pair of old underwear fell out of my pant leg. And it wasn't the only one in there.

Sheldon: I'm sorry.
(Pats Leonard on the back)
Leonard: Did you just put a 'Kick Me' sign on my back?
Sheldon: (pause) No. That wouldn't be funny at all.
(Rips a paper off Leonard's back)

Sheldon: Can't sleep?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: Would you like to talk about it?
Leonard: Penny proposed, and I didn't say yes.
Sheldon: Why not?
Leonard: That's a good question.
Sheldon: Does that mean the relationship is over?
Leonard: I don't know.
Sheldon: Why don't you ask her?
Leonard: Because I'm afraid to know the answer.
Sheldon: Well... I'm sorry.
Leonard: That's it? You're not going to make some dumb joke or some inappropriate comment?
Sheldon: No. You're my friend and... I'm sorry.

Stuart: How about those guys on that bench over there; they look pathetic. Bet we could talk to them.
Raj: That's a mirror.

Amy: Do you have any idea how hard it is to laugh at a knock-knock joke that starts with knock knock knock, Amy, knock knock knock, Amy, knock knock knock, Amy?

Stuart: When I was a baby, my mother called me her little possum.
Raj: Are possums cute?
Stuart: Not at all.

Penny: You didn't get your part cut. And you didn't get your part cut. Yep a bunch of old guys rocking out in a band all with erectile dysfunction, you didn't get your part cut.
Leonard: Hey, can we talk?
Penny: We can, but the part of Penny might get cut.

Howard: Star Wars Audition, Take 1. Starring Howard Joel Wolowitz, real-life astronaut.
(turns away from the camera, puts up his hood, then turns back in character)
Howard: Vader is here. Now. On this moon. I felt his presence. He's come for me. He can feel when I'm near.
Bernadette: How many times do I have to tell you to replace the toilet paper when it's empty?
Howard: I'm in the middle of something!
Bernadette: So am I!

Howard: (to Raj) If you're really desperate to meet women and like having food eaten out of your mouth, I could set you up with my mom.
(Leonard and Howard laugh)
Sheldon: Why is that funny? That's just unhygienic.
Leonard: It's a joke.
Sheldon: I don't think so. I believe that a joke is a brief oral narrative with a climatic humorous twist.

Penny: I want you right now to give me your one hundred percent honest opinion. Do you think I have what it takes to really make it as an actress?
Leonard: Yes.
Penny: So you think I'll be on TV and in movies and win awards?
Leonard: Honestly?
Penny: Yes, honestly.
Leonard: I don't.
Penny: How could you say that!
Leonard: I don't, no, I got all confused when you said honestly.

Raj: I read a study that says a man with a dog is three times more likely to get a woman's phone number.
Leonard: Is it true even when the man lets his dog lick peanut butter off his tongue?
Raj: I don't see why not.
Howard: If you're really desperate to meet women and like having food eaten out of your mouth, I could set you up with my mom.

Leonard: The odds of *anyone* becoming a successful actor, like a million to one.
Penny: Wow, thank you.
(She exits)
Leonard: (to himself) Should have let Sheldon come

Amy: Sheldon, you scared me, that wasn't funny.
Sheldon: Maybe you have a stick up your prefrontal cortex.

Amy: It's nice that we all get to eat together.
(the guys mumble in agreement)
Amy: Can we maybe put the phones down and have an actual human conversation?
Sheldon: We can, but thanks to Steve Jobs we don't have to.
Penny: Guys, guys. You're never going to believe this.
Leonard: What happened?
Penny: I just got a job on a TV show.
Amy: Congratulations.
Leonard: That's great. Guys!
(Guys mumble acknowledgement)
Howard: What's the show?
Penny: Um, NCII or... you know, NCSTD. I don't know. It's... It's the one with all the letters and I'm going to be on it.
Leonard: That's amazing.
Penny: Yeah!
Howard: What's your part?
Penny: I play a customer in a diner and I flirt with Mark Harmon.
Raj: Ooooh. Mark Harmon. He's a dreamboat.
Leonard: So it it's just flirting.
Penny: Well, yeah, why?
Leonard: No reason. I just think it's sexier when left to the imagination.
Penny: Oh.
Amy: He's wrong.

Notes and Trivia

In the end credits vanity card #436, Chuck Lorre reveals that the filming matches the story where the small part played by a young, relatively unknown actress named Lexie Contursi ended up on the cutting room floor due to no fault of her own. She was supposed to play 'Beautiful Young Woman' who talks to Raj and Stuart, but her scene was cut for time. Lorre stated that he hoped he could give her another role on the show, but unfortunately, this never materialized.

The mall security guard is played by Marcus Folmar. He is the same actor who played the cop that pulls Howard over in Season 10 Episode 1.

The NCIS (2003) episode Penny was supposed to be on was Kill Chain (2014).

Goofs

None

Cast

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