S03E03 - The Gothowitz Deviation

No: 43  |  Season: 3   Episode: 3  |  Air Date: 2009-10-05  |  Runtime: mins

Howard: (to Raj) Yes, she's pushy, and yes, he's whipped, but that's not the expression.

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Summary

Sheldon attempts to covertly alter Penny's habits, while Howard and Raj try their luck meeting women at a Goth-style club.

Director and Writers

Director: Mark Cendrowski
Writers: Story by: Lee Aronsohn & Richard Rosenstock / Teleplay by: Bill Prady & Maria Ferrari

Script

Script: S03E03 - The Gothowitz Deviation

Quotes

Leonard: Sheldon, you can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat.
Sheldon: Actually, it turns out I can.
Leonard: Well, you shouldn't.
Sheldon: Oh, ugh. There's just no pleasing you, is there? You weren't happy with my approach with her, so I decided to employ operant conditioning techniques building on the works of Thorndike and B.F. Skinner. Next week, I believe I can have her jumping out of a pool balancing a beach ball on her nose.
Leonard: No, this has to stop now.
Sheldon: I'm not suggesting we really make her jump out of a pool. I thought the "buzzinga" was implied. I'm just tweaking her personality, sanding off the rough edges, if you will.

Bethany: What are you going to get, Howard?
Howard: Well, I can't really decide between a screaming devil, this mean little skull or Kermit the Frog.
Bethany: Kermit the Frog?
Howard: You know.
(Kermit voice)
Howard: Hi ho, I'm on Howard's butt!
Bethany: Get the mean little skull, and I'll see if I can make him smile.
Howard: Yeah, I'd like the mean little skull, please.

Leonard: (Howard and Raj leave to go to a goth nightclub) They're gonna get beaten up at that club.
Penny: They're gonna get beaten up at Walgreens.

Leonard: (Talking about how Sheldon deals with Penny) All I'm saying is that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
Sheldon: You can catch even more flies with manure. What's your point?

Penny: Oh man, did the Kiss army repeal 'don't ask, don't tell'?

Penny: (dancing and singing along to the radio) "I'm goin' out tonight / I'm feelin' alright /Gonna let it all hang out / Wanna make some noise really raise my voice / Yeah, I wanna scream and shout. Ah. No-" Morning, Sheldon. Come dance with me.
Sheldon: No.
Penny: Why not?
Sheldon: (turns radio off) Penny, while I subscribe to the "Many Worlds" theory which posits the existence of an infinite number of Sheldons in an infinite number of universes, I assure you that in none of them am I dancing.
Penny: Are you fun in any of them?
Sheldon: The math would suggest that in a few I'm a clown made of candy. But I don't dance.

Howard: (to Raj) Yes, she's pushy, and yes, he's whipped, but that's not the expression.

Leonard: I'm just saying, you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar.
Sheldon: You can catch even more flies with manure; what's your point?

Penny: You know what? I give up. He's impossible.
Sheldon: I can't be impossible, I exist. I believe what you meant to say is, "I give up. He's improbable."
Leonard: Sheldon, you need to find a better way of dealing with Penny.
Sheldon: What am I supposed to do? Eat French toast on a Monday? Now, that would be impossible.

Sheldon: Obviously, waitressing at the Cheesecake Factory is a complex socio-economic activity that requires a great deal of analysis and planning... Buzzinga. You know, using positive reinforcement techniques I could train that behavior out of her in a week.
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: If you let me use negative reinforcement I can get it done before we go to bed.
Leonard: You're not squirting her in the face with water.
Sheldon: No, of course not. We're talking very mild electric shocks. No tissue damage whatsoever.
Leonard: Forget it.
Sheldon: Oh, come on. You can't tell me that you're not intrigued about the possibility of building a better girlfriend.
Leonard: I'm not. Penny's qualities, both good and bad, are what make her who she is.

Leonard: OK. I know what you're doing.
Sheldon: Really?
Leonard: Yes, you're using chocolates as positive reinforcement for what you consider correct behaviour.
Sheldon: Very good. Chocolate?
Leonard: No, I don't want any chocolate! Sheldon, you can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat.

Penny: Kim, the night manager, went on maternity leave, and her husband's name is Sandy. So get this, her replacement is a woman named Sandy whose husband's name is Kim.
(chortling)
Leonard: Wow.
Penny: I know. What are the odds? Oh.
Sheldon: Easily calculable. We begin by identifying the set of couples with unisex names. We eliminate those unqualified for restaurant work: the aged, the imprisoned and the limbless, for example. Next, we look at the...
Leonard: Sheldon. It's an amazing coincidence. Can we leave it at that?
Sheldon: I'm sorry. Oh, Penny, it's as if the Cheesecake Factory is run by witches.
Penny: Ooh, Sheldon, it's as if you don't think I'll punch you.

Leonard: No, I don't want any chocolate! Sheldon, you can't train my girlfriend like a lab rat.
Sheldon: Actually, it turns out I can.
Leonard: Well, you shouldn't.
Sheldon: There's just no pleasing you, is there, Leonard? You weren't happy with my previous approach to dealing with her, so I decided to employ operant conditioning techniques, building on the work of Thorndike and B.F. Skinner. By this time next week, I believe I can have her jumping out of a pool, balancing a beach ball on her nose.
Leonard: No, this has to stop now.
Sheldon: I'm not suggesting we really make her jump out of a pool. I thought the "bazinga" was implied. I'm just tweaking her personality, sanding off the rough edges if you will.
Leonard: No, you're not sanding Penny.
Sheldon: Are you saying that I'm forbidden from applying a harmless, scientifically valid protocol that will make our lives better?
Leonard: Yes, you're forbidden.
Sheldon: (Squirts him) Bad Leonard.

Howard: They're called tattoo sleeves. Look. I bought them online. Raj got a set too. Fantastic, right? Put them on, have sex with some freaky girl with her business pierced, take them off, and I can still be buried in a Jewish cemetery.

Howard: Hey, wanna try a country bar tomorrow night?
Raj: Yeah, maybe we'll get lucky with some sexy cowgirls.
Howard: Could happen.
Raj: I wonder how they smell.

Sheldon: Interesting. Sex works even better than chocolate to modify behavior. I wonder if anyone else has stumbled onto that?

Sheldon: (to himself) Interesting... Sex works even better than chocolate for modifying behavior. I wonder if anyone else has stumbled upon that?

Sheldon: Look, Leonard, Penny made French toast.
Leonard: Sorry, I haven't given her your schedule yet.
Sheldon: It's an iCal download. She can put it right in her phone. And we agreed you'd have conjugal visits in her apartment.
Leonard: We did, but there were extenuating circumstances.
Sheldon: I see. Did her abysmal housekeeping skills finally trump her perkiness?
Leonard: No, her bed kind of broke.
Sheldon: That doesn't seem likely. Her bed's of sturdy construction. Even the addition of a second normal-sized human wouldn't cause a structural failure, much less a homunculus such as yourself.
Penny: A homunculus?
Leonard: Perfectly formed miniature human being.
Penny: Oh, you're my little homunculus.

Sheldon: Would you like a chocolate?
Penny: Um, yeah, sure. Thanks.
Leonard: What was that?
Sheldon: You said be nice to Penny. I believe offering chocolate to someone falls within the definition of "nice".
Leonard: It does. But in my experience, you don't.
Sheldon: There are more things in heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
Leonard: Yeah, now, that's you. Obnoxious and insufferable.

Notes and Trivia

Confusingly, the fake tattoo sleeves as described by Howard (Simon Helberg) are actually real genuine products, not just the more commonly known term for arm length real tattoos. Howard and Raj (Kunal Nayyar) are wearing a version described as "realistic nylon mesh tattoo sleeves used in the movie and television industry", similar to women's stockings.

Leonard (Johnny Galecki), Sheldon (Jim Parsons), and Penny (Kaley Cuoco) are watching the anime: Oshikuru: Demon Samurai, which is a reference to episode 2.10 The Salmon Under My Sweater (2004), of Two and a Half Men (2003) in which Charlie (Charlie Sheen) and Jake (Angus T. Jones) collaborate on the theme song to the same show. Both series are created by Chuck Lorre. The actual audio representing Oshikuru: Demon Samurai was from an anime called Boogiepop Never Laughs: Boogiepop Phantom (2000).

Molly Morgan, who plays Bethany, re-appears in episode 8.16, The Intimacy Acceleration (2015), playing the hostess who leads Raj (Kunal Nayyar), Emily (Laura Spencer), Amy (Mayim Bialik) and Leonard (Johnny Galecki) into the Crystal Maze-themed "escape room".

The dance that Penny (Kaley Cuoco) does while making French toast is the exact same dance done by the character Ginger in The Terminator (1984), even to the degree that her hair is up and she is wearing her man's shirt.

When Sheldon (Jim Parsons) says "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy," he is quoting Hamlet in Act 1 Scene 5 of William Shakespeare's play.

Goofs

None

Cast

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